gratitude week--Post #6

I really wanted to post pictures of the best thing I'm thankful for, but we're experiencing technical difficulties. Hopefully soon. But, my most precious gratitude gift:

My family is all back together.

We blessed Eve on Sunday, because Heidi is home this week for Thanksgiving.

More details and images coming soon!

Gratitude Week--Post #5

WARNING: Spoiler Alert!
If you have not watched Survivor, you may want to wait to read this post.

Reality TV--the only TV I watch. With so much down-time on my hands right now, reality TV has become a dependable friend. The Amazing Race and Survivor, Dancing with the Stars and American Idol and anything on HGTV .

The Amazing Race this week took a turn for the vicious--although I truly think it was unintentional on both sides. But I tell you right now that I wouldn't want to cross 6'9" Big Easy. He seems nice enough, but . . .
I really want the Globetrotters to take it all. But I wouldn't care if Megan and Cheyne won, either.

Dancing with the Stars is just a little mind candy. I fast-forward through most of it, cutting its unendurable two hours down to about 40 minutes. And Joanna was robbed, that's for sure. Donny should have left, and y'all know how I feel about Brother Osmond!

If you ignore its rocky start, this season of Survivor has turned into one of the best ever!
I was in the "Hate Russell" camp from the beginning. But boy, can he play the game! I would venture to say that he is the best player in the history of the game. Finding three hidden immunity idols in a row (two without any clues of any kind!) is unprecedented. I wish I had a tape of Tucker watching last week's episode when Russell played the second idol--screaming, jumping, pumping his arms. Best Tucker quote: "Some people get excited about the Super Bowl. I get excited about a well-played immunity idol." And I would have to agree. It was one of the best moments ever on the show. And when Russell found the third idol last night, well, that was one of the only things that could get T out of his flu funk (yes, I am now officially the last person standing at our house). The strategy employed last night was primo. A tie and then John defected from his alliance. What will the next move be? Will Russell reveal his hidden idol? I can't wait until next week!
What I love the most about Survivor is this: It is a show that our entire family, from oldest to youngest can sit together and watch and enjoy. Last night, Ben and Micah snuggled under a blanket on one couch, Lily commanded the brown throne, Hyrum and I cuddled in the other chair, Tucker's six-foot frame sprawled on the other couch, and Brad rocked Eve back and forth as we all enjoyed the drama together, alternating who was excited and who was annoyed. It's almost 100 percent family-friendly, and that right there is why I love it. It's the only show Brad even watches, so I'm glad we can all watch together. That's how TV used to be. Remember Disney's Sunday night?

A few other small random things I am grateful for today:

Last night, around 3 am, Hyrum sleepily made his way into our room. "Daddy. Daddy. Yicah needs a go baffroom." How sweet is that? Micah had woken up his legs, Hyrum willingly and kindly got Dad. The blessing of sharing a room.

And after bragging about my returned energy, I took a nap yesterday (today too, for that matter). But my nap yesterday was one of sheer happiness. One of the best things about having a newborn baby is having them sleep on your chest for long episodes. And I just happened to fall asleep, too. Woke up with a crick in my neck and tingly feet from resting on the ottoman for 45 minutes, but I had a wrinkle-faced baby on my chest to make it delicious.

Gratitude Week--Post #4

I didn't think it was ever going to happen. But it did. Yesterday.

The Energizer Bunny is coming back!

Finally. I've missed you so much, dear friend. After eight and a half months of pregnancy and three and a half weeks of recovery, I felt almost like myself yesterday. I was able to run errands (with two small children in tow), put all the Costco supplies away, clean out the freezer, straighten up a little, even get dressed in real clothes. (Okay, the clothes weren't my skinny clothes, and my jeans did have a ponytail holder looped from the button through the buttonhole, but still! Nothing on my body was from the maternity section!) And I took no nap, either!

Even though my sleeping has been erratic at best. Even though I fought the flu with both hands for a few days. I feel great! My energy level is beginning to return to normal levels. I was beginning to think that having a baby at 40 permanently depletes you and sends you into a pre-menopausal dirge.

And I'm so happy that I was wrong!

Today--A few more errands, maybe even a little light exercise.

Hello, world!

Jenny's back!

Yah-Hoo!

Gratitude Week--Post #3

A Tale of Two Women
(and others, too)

I really should have written about these two great women sooner.

This is Brad's mom, Grandma Janie. She has come to help me with all my babies from Ben down. I always feel bad for her when she's down here, because her attention is pulled in so many directions. Two of her daughters live close, so she has to divide her time accordingly. But when she comes to help with babies, that's her top priority. Her approach to helping is this: She made dinner, watched kids while Micah got his cast, took Hyrum to the park and cousins' houses, and straightened. She really loves to do the baby stuff. Every night, she gave Eve her bath, and every day when it was bottle time, that was Grandma time, too. She also, fully meaning what she said, offered to take the baby at night when she was awake. Unfortunately for me and for Grandma, Eve slept every night Grandma was here. Too bad she wasn't here Sunday night! Just the idea that if the baby got too cranky I could hand her off was huge.

This is Grandma Tucker with Eve as we were leaving the hospital. When Grandma T comes, she admittedly needs her sleep at night, so we always try to give her that. But during the day, we run her ragged. She makes breakfast, gets kids out the door to school, cleans up everything, makes me take it easy and rest as much as possible, makes dinner, drives kids around, holds the baby whenever possible, encourages kids to help her (in a way only grandmas can), plays games whenever asked, and asks for kisses and hugs from Hyrum, who rarely agrees. She also brought a beautiful quilt (I would include a picture here, but Karen took it to show her friend . . . hint, hint, Karen!) and the most amazing handmade blessing dress and bonnet (which didn't fit, and she had to alter before she left). She mended Brad's temple pants and painstakingly sewed buttons on the cuffs of his new suit jacket (this was a lot harder than it sounds!). She also enjoyed Survivor, The Amazing Race, and Dancing with the Stars with me.


Between these two wonderful ladies, I was able to recover quite quickly. I hope that one day (not too soon!) I'll be as helpful to my kids and their new babies.

And they haven't been alone. I've had at least 3 loaves of bread dropped off, numerous visits, and one extremely thoughtful friend brought dinner to my sick and weak family last night. I keep thinking of Elder Jeffrey R. Holland's talk from October 2008:

"When we speak of those who are instruments in the hand of God, we are reminded that not all angels are from the other side of the veil. Some of them we walk with and talk with—here, now, every day. Some of them reside in our own neighborhoods. Some of them gave birth to us, and in my case, one of them consented to marry me. Indeed heaven never seems closer than when we see the love of God manifested in the kindness and devotion of people so good and so pure that angelic is the only word that comes to mind."

Epiphany #104--Angels surround us and minister to us daily. It's up to us to recognize them in their earthly forms.

Thank you, ladies.

Gratitude Week--Post #2

I had planned on a lighthearted gratitude tribute to reality TV today.

But that will have to wait.

The flu has hit our family with a vengeance. Hyrum had it Sunday. Lily and Micah had it yesterday. I think Eve had it yesterday, too, but I can't confirm that. Ben and Brad threw up all night. Total vomit episodes since Saturday night--over THIRTY! It is a very violent but luckily short-lived bug. Tucker and I are the lone healthy people in our house.

And after one especially disgusting episode involving Ben and the carpet, I decided I needed to continue my love for cleaning products.
Nothing is better than this little guy when it comes to spills (or expectorations) on the carpet. Ah, how I love thee, little SpotBot. It does all the work for you. You just load up the soap and water, and then press go. And off it goes. At 1:27 am, there is nothing more valuable (except for maybe the washer!)

I am grateful the virus is fast. Brad was able to watch the kids today for a few hours while I caught a much-needed 2-hour nap. And I slept like it was night. When I got up I was once again ready to face a quarantined house. Still tired, just not immobile and crying. Which is good, in my book.

Today I am also grateful for my sick kids. Nothing brings home the importance of priesthood blessings like being sick. I'm so glad we have our dad to give us blessings when they're needed. Lily asked last night, "I wish there was never any sick. Why does there have to be sick?" This led to a great family home evening discussion about opposition in all things, and how good we feel when we are finally well again. She experienced that today when she was well enough to go to school this afternoon. And Micah was so miserable last night. When I asked him if I could do anything to help him, he moaned, "Mommy, I just need a love." And that was what he got. Snuggles on the couch, between dry heaves. And honestly, I enjoyed every minute (except rinsing the bowl).

Finally, I am so grateful to have a nursing baby. There is nothing more joyful to me than to look down at my sweet tiny babe (weighed in yesterday at 7 lb. 8 oz. fully clothed), eyes wide and milk running down her face. Oh how I love her.

Epiphany #103--It's not the trial that is valuable. It's the lessons we learn while fighting in the trenches.

Gratitude Week--Post #1

I'm too exhausted for a very thoughtful post. Refer back to last Monday's "weary mind" reference. Unluckily for us, Hyrum threw up all night Saturday night. I still think, two days and one night later, that it was too much junk at the park with cousins Saturday night, but that doesn't make things any easier.

And following in the wake of puke: Baby had her roughest night yet last night. Luckily, Brad relieved me at 4 am so I could sleep until the kids needed to be up at 6:15. Two nights in a row of no sleep is enough to throw anyone for a loop, isn't it?

Hopefully tomorrow I will be coherent enough for a real post on gratitude. Let me just begin with these two items I am thankful for:

After five different bouts with vomit in four hours, I was still uttering a small prayer of gratitude under my breath, "Heavenly Father, I am so thankful that I have a washer and dryer." And I meant it.


And, of course, for Baby Eve. I feel like I'm not enjoying her as much as I should most of the time because I'm so bone-tired, but I am so grateful for this blessing in my life and in our home. She is truly a doll.

In case you can't tell from these pictures, she LOVES the bath. More than my other kids, I think (but I don't remember all that well--I'm kinda old now).


Yes, those are ugly dishcloths on my baby. But they are clean. (Note to self: buy new dishcloths for photo ops.)




And when she's awake, she is WIDE awake. Her eyes get so big and she tries to process everything in her sight.
Could it be? Will her eyes stay blue? It couldn't be. You've seen the rest of us, right?

Post-script: So much for my "food poisoning" theory. The school just called. Lily is on her way home--she just threw up. Which straw is going to break my back? I hope this isn't the one.

News I Thought I'd Never Hear

A few weeks ago, I received a message on my cell phone from Baby A's grandmother.

That was a surprise, for sure. Such a surprise, frankly, that it took me a few days to wrap my head around calling her back.

Then, she called me back, and we talked.

She needed a little bit of information about A's welfare status while he was with us, in order for him to qualify up there in the hinterlands of AZ.

We briefly discussed the issue at hand. And I didn't know how to act. I didn't know what to say. But I wanted to know. A lot of different things. Like--Is he eating? Is he happy? Does he miss us?

So I asked a general question: How is he doing? And she responded, quite happily. He's doing really well. He loves to read and sing and watch TV. And he especially loves to eat. One thing he's doing there is helping his grandma feed the animals. He loves animals, she said. I couldn't muster up much to say except, "Good. I'm glad." And we left it at that.

It's been almost three months since he left our family. And how do I feel now?

Well, it's hard to answer that question. So much has happened to our family since he left that I haven't had much time to dwell on the hole he left. We still talk about him occasionally. For example, Tuesday night I had Micah and Hyrum in the bath and his name came up. Hyrum said, "Jell-o is gone to his grandma's." But there were no tears and no further comment.

I must admit that life is easier with only one toddler in the house. And quieter. But since he left, Hyrum has become more reclusive and less willing to leave me. Hates nursery, where he used to love it. Doesn't want to go anywhere without me. This could just be a two-year-old's stage, but the timing was a little too close for me to just assume that it's a stage.

I don't know how I'd be recovering from the new baby with twins underfoot. Maybe they'd be hard. Maybe they'd entertain each other more.

Everyone else seems to have moved on.

Now the question posed is this: Will we foster again? I don't know. With my life in a constant state of upheaval right now, I can't imagine adding another wild card into the mix. A wild card that could bring not only commotion and behavioral problems, but could also bring disease (that has happened to us before). I forced my own kids to get the H1N1 vaccine (judge me or judge me not--if I hadn't had a brand-new baby I would still be on the fence on this issue). Let's leave it at that. For now, the answer is: not now.

And I never got an answer to one of my questions. I'll never know if he ever missed us. But that's okay. Really.

And, on a completely unrelated note, last night's Survivor may go down in history as the best episode ever. That's all I'm going to say about it.